A few types of questions might not be perceived pleasantly from someone, because they might not be of the types that would fit to their current model of perceiving the world. They have only been engaging in activities that the others have said and told them to do, and might even think that there is not any other alternative pathway for them. They might be afraid and have a deficiency of determination to consider where are they focusing the most and reflect whether that is worth their attention.
Just because you have been doing something repeatedly might not turn it into an important endeavor. The areas that you are currently focusing on might not be the ones that would truly help you achieve a meaningful and a valuable life that all of us aim for. If you find yourself constantly engaged in a lot of activities, you might not be able to have a time to pause and reflect about these questions. However asking yourself a few questions during your work break, or while travelling to your work or back home (supposing that you are not the driver) might be helpful. You might also think of waking up a few minutes earlier and writing down the answers, if you do not think that you can find a free time slot in your agenda.
Ask yourself whether you are doing things that are really worth doing.
- Would you regret doing them when you are 80 years old?
- Are they bringing meaningful and valuable experiences to your life?
- If money was not an issue, would you still be doing them?
- Are you engaging in a few tasks and routines only because you are trying to distract yourself from the areas that are truly important to you?
- If you were to start your career now, would you choose the same one once again?
Try to write down sincere answers, otherwise you are only going to lie yourself. As the Nobel Prize winner, Richard Feynman used to say, “The first principle is that you must not fool yourself and you are the easiest person to fool.” You might want to repeat this exercise several times and understand the frequent pattern that is appearing. After you have identified that, try to give a serious thought about the ways that would help you get closer to these tasks and try to do them with a purpose. It might not be comfortable asking yourself these types of intimidating questions, but it can have considerable impacts in the long term, because it can shape your connections and help you have a life that fits with your values.
